The magic closet
Judy Conlin
All is quiet at our house at last. The weeping and wailing and the wringing of hands subsided when I finally drove away with 2 huge bags of clothing from Nurse Judy’s (she’s(my clotheshorse alter ego) and my walk-in closet. I left her weeping surrounded by the hundreds of hangers that had previously held up all her clothes that were now in those bags. For weeks I had been trying to clear out all her extra paraphernalia but as quickly as I placed them in the trash bag, she had rehung them in the closet. I was getting nowhere until I locked the door, filled my bags and made a quick exit.
Returning home, I did not know what to expect. At first, I did not see her and became worried that she might have followed me to the donation center, though how she could have done that on foot, I do not know. I found her sitting on the floor in the spare bedroom surrounded by empty hangers, a mournful look on her face. She did not scream. She did not yell. She did not cry. She just looked very sad. “I have nothing to wear,” she said plaintively, holding an empty hanger against her heart.
“Of course you do,” I say. “Let’s go see what we can find in the newly slimmed down closet. I led her by hand down the hall. When we entered the closet, we were both astounded. The closet was as tightly packed as ever. I was furious with her. “How did you do this?” I asked. “How did you get all these clothes back in here.?”
“She was wide-eyed in awe. “I did not do this,” she said defiantly.
“Well, I certainly didn’t,” I I said… “I was the one cleaning it out,”
“Well, I certainly didn’t,” she said. “I was the one you locked out “
“You must have found a way back in,” I say accusingly
“Did not”
“Did too.”
“Did not. Hey, this quarrel is getting us nowhere. .You saw me drive away with 2 bags full of these clothes. How did they get back in here if you didn’t somehow find a way to sneak them back?”
“I know I’m clever,” she says with a wicked grin, “ but I can’t figure out any way I could have done this. Can you?”
I think and think. I cannot honestly come up with a way she could have carried out such a mean plan, but then she has surprised me in the past. While I’m thinking I notice she is flipping through the clothes in the again overpacked closet.
“What’s going on?” I ask her.
She has a puzzled look on her face. “I’m noticing all my long beaded ball gowns are missing.”
“They were the first things I threw out,” I say. “You haven’t been to a ball in years. You must have missed them when you repacked this closet.”
“That’s not all that’s missing,” she continues. “All my low necked tops and bejeweled skirts are missing. Lots of things are missing.”
Now she’s got my attention. I start looking through the racks with her. All the things I threw in the bags are not here. These are her clothes that were left. “How could just what is left still stuff the closet?” I ask wonderingly.
“We have a magic closet,” she responds happily. “It will make sure I always have something to wear.”
I don’t respond. Let her think she has a magic closet. The truth is that even when I weed out hundreds of garments, Nurse Judy has enough clothes left to keep any closet full. I’ll never win this one.
More later, Judy
www.nursejudyinfo.com